Changed

Brent Stone (00:00.508)
Hey, welcome to changed. I'm Brent Stone and I'm really excited about today. I've got a good friend with me, JR Spear. He is going to be sharing not only his transformation story, but there are some other things that I'm really excited about for him to share today too. He, he has a really wild story and a lot of you will, will maybe relate, maybe not relate, but either way, it's going to be.

Really, really awesome. JR, thanks for being here with us today. How would you like to just go ahead and take it away and just tell our listenership and viewership, you know, about your transformational encounter with Jesus and how it's changed your life?

JR Spear (00:43.774)
Yeah, absolutely. So I'll go back to like more of my teenage years, but you know, before that I want people to have a good understanding about like my upbringing and where I actually came from. So it adds a little bit more context to like where, what God's done in my life and where I've actually been taken to. So from, uh, so from a very young age, I grew up in a family, you know, a single family home with four sisters and you know, there, there was never really a whole lot. I mean, we, we went to church and we, we did the things and, and uh, that,

Brent Stone (00:59.925)
Awesome.

JR Spear (01:13.118)
that we're supposed to be doing just kind of checking the box like, okay, I went to church, we're doing our good deed and all these different things, but never really filled like with the Holy Spirit and never really understanding what that was. It was like, Hey, you know what? I'm a believer. And so I originally at eight years old accepted Jesus as my Lord and savior. But then through the teenage years, I started getting really rebellious as hanging out the wrong crowd. I was doing my own thing. I was smoking dope. I was, I was just kind of just being a dumb kid. You know, I wasn't showing up to school. I was, you know, kind of

skipping classes majority of the time of the year and just, um, you know, just kind of, I always had this mindset of saying, Oh God will forgive me later. So I was even through this time I was, I was still a Christian, still a believer, but I always thought like, you know, God's going to forgive me later. We'll be good so I can still have fun and enjoy it. And I deserve to be happy. You know, we all, we all get that lied where we tell us, I was like, Oh, we deserve to be happy. We deserve this. We deserve that. But that's just a lie or the enemy to keep us where we're at. And I didn't, I literally walked around.

And I remember clear as day, but I walked around with some sort of evil spirit where I constantly felt angry. Like I, my eyes were always frowning. I was always looking at people with disgust and I was like, if you said something wrong to me, I immediately wanted to fight you. And it was, uh, I didn't really know that was living in me for, for forever. And you know, it just, there was a big eye wakening moment for me and it came to like, I was, I was 16 years old.

And my mom invited me to October Fest at our church. It was a pretty big church in St. Louis, Missouri. And it's actually where I met Michael at. But they had an October Fest and I was like, okay, sure, I'll come to it. I don't really have anything else going on. And they had a bunch of rides and cool things going on. And then I ended up running into this girl. And she was beautiful. Skinny girl, looked pretty fit, blonde hair, and just really just caught my attention. I was like, man, I got to get to know this girl. Her name was Elizabeth.

And so I ended up going up to her. I was always very bold, but I ended up going up talking to her and getting to know more where she was. And I ended up hanging out with her like all night. And so they have like a big youth game room area where they had like pool tables and basketball and game arcade room and all this different stuff. And she's introduced to me to all these different people. I was like, oh, this is cool. But I really want to just hang out with you. And so we were hanging out all night long and keep in mind too.

JR Spear (03:34.134)
When I remember when I went to this October Fest, I had a sack of weed in my pocket and just kind of went there, just wanted to chase girls and wanted to have fun. And so when we were there, the night was coming to a close and we said goodbye and I was like, hey, how can we reconnect? And she was like, and I asked her for her number. She's like, I'm home school, I don't really have my own phone number, my mom doesn't really let me have boys, but I'll be here at church on this Friday.

And, uh, she, so I went to church that Friday and you know, I was looking for familiar faces, found some of those guys that she introduced me to and a couple of them were still really good friends to me today. Actually. One of them is, uh, Eric Saffron 10, which you, you got to know and he's a close friend of mine ever since. And, uh, she, I showed up and hanging out with these people and she didn't show up. She wasn't there. I was like, what the heck is going on? So, uh, you know,

Brent Stone (04:12.573)
Yeah.

JR Spear (04:24.962)
It was, but it was really cool being able to meet a whole different crowd and meeting new people and just really, I could tell like God was doing something to me at the time. I didn't really know. I was like, Oh, new friends. They seem pretty cool. And let me, let me just go hang out with them. And so I just kept showing up every weekend was because you know, I was like, these are these are some really cool people. They weren't like, they were strong Christians filled the Holy Spirit. But it's not like they came on to me and with judgment or anything like that. It was just more of, hey, let's hang out. Let's go do this or let's go to the restaurant. Let's go whatever and just seemed like a really cool crowd.

Brent Stone (04:33.93)
Yeah.

JR Spear (04:54.418)
And then shortly after that was a, you know, around Halloween timeframe. And then shortly after they were getting ready for the Christmas production. Well, I was still really involved in music at school and a cappella choir, show choir, and a bunch of other things. And so I, uh, I loved music, but they have this, uh, the Christian production and some of the people that I was hanging out with were, were being part of it. And I was like, Oh, you know, I wouldn't mind being part of it and just kind of getting to know some of the people and you know, hanging out and doing choir is like, why not?

So I ended up just signed up and being part of it, doing the practices and showing up for rehearsal and stuff like that. And then that's where I met Michael. And so met Michael and during that time and he was singing Oh Holy Night. And I remember seeing him up on stage and him singing Oh Holy Night. And it just really took my heart. I was like, man, that was the most powerful, most spirit. I was just captivated by everything that the way that he did it. And it just really moved me in a powerful way. And so.

you know, with that, I could tell like my heart was starting to change in that in that moment. But it was shortly after that Christmas production and I was there during a, uh, one of the regular church services, I think it was like a Friday night and the pastor did like an altar call. Well, I'm, I'm there worshiping and I'm, I'm really engaged into what's going on. And, and then you get to think about, there's like three to 5,000 plus people in the service at one time during the, during this, uh, this event.

And you know, at the different, when he did all the call, I found myself like opening my eyes and I'm standing in front of the church at the altar with the pastor, just me and him. And I was like, how, I remember looking around and like, how the heck did I even get up here? I had no clue even, I don't have no remembrance of walking up to that stage and doing the altar call or anything like that. And I just looked around, I was like, oh crap, what the heck is going on?

And it was, you know, I was just lost in worship. I was just lost in what God was doing because during that Christmas production and just meeting everyone and then just being really surrendered into the worship and what the services, you know, the pet, those couple of months were very transformative for me. And I say this because, you know, when, when God wants to take you and he's going to take you, but not just that, there's something very different and powerful about being blessed and being baptized in the Holy spirit that ultimately would change even your walk in Christ.

JR Spear (07:11.306)
because it was in that moment where I was I was baptized in the Holy Spirit, I was washed by his blood. And I was I literally walked out of that church during that service completely a changed person. And had you know, walked outside threw away a sack of weed in the trash. I was like, what was it? I remember looking I was like, what is this? I have like no desire for didn't want it and just threw it away and, and never really look back at it.

But where it really started to shit for me, like, yes, I rededicated that night. I was baptized in the Holy Spirit. I was feeling the change and what God was doing in my life. But I remember going to school that next couple days later, and I'm sitting in choir class. And there was this kid next to me named Josh. And I looked at him as a hey, Josh, what's going on? And he about jumped out of the seat. I think it was terrified. Like I was gonna beat him up or say something mean or whatever. And to me, I didn't really know that I didn't know that that's how I was acting that that's how I came across to

Brent Stone (08:02.156)
I just want to pause real quick because you're doing awesome. But for anyone that's watching this, I know you, but they don't. So JR has a background where he actually competitively kickboxed or you did. I know you martial arts training, but you were black belt and you did. Yeah, like fourth degree black belt, like when he, when he says these things, there's a reason why these people like wouldn't want to engage.

JR Spear (08:17.834)
American cake boxing, Muay Thai, Taekwondo, Judo. I mean, I grew up in it since the day I could walk. So just.

JR Spear (08:29.886)
Yeah. Well, I didn't know I was given off that type of demeanor. I didn't realize that I was technically a bully. It never really knew it. And like when I talk, when I say that I was walking around with the frown on my face and just really always having a pissed off attitude all the time, I didn't recognize that. I didn't really know what, what the spirit of the joy or what, what that even, what happened in a Steven Loach. Like I just thought that was like, you know, I'm angry, I'm mad and I didn't even know what I was angry. I'm mad at, I was just always an angry individual.

Brent Stone (08:35.881)
Right.

Brent Stone (08:57.994)
Yeah.

JR Spear (08:58.09)
But when I said hi to him that morning, it really woke me up and like, Oh, wow. You know, I, I really was, I was seeing things in a completely different light and it really was transformative for me and just be like, you know, God really did something in my life and then in that moment and, uh, you know, something I never really shared on broadcast or anywhere and only shared the story a couple to a couple of different people. But around that same moment, I remember I went to bed one night and I fell asleep on the couch downstairs in our basement. And, uh, when I did,

my sister, me and her, our bedrooms were down there and her room was like next to mine. And I'm sitting on the couch. And I woke up in the middle of the night and, and couldn't move like I there was there was like some spiritual warfare literally going on inside of me. And I was terrified because I like if you're seeing the exorcist where the that child was floating above the bed, I felt like I was probably three feet above that couch. I was trying to like yell like, you know, ask for help. And I couldn't I couldn't even make a sound.

And I was sweating to death. I felt like there was so much pressure on my chest and in my throat and didn't know what was going on. And you know, I see counsel on this. I was talking to Michael and essentially I was going through spiritual warfare where the enemy and the Holy Spirit were literally fighting for me and for my spirit and what I was doing. And that's where it actually, you know, won and took it away and never felt that experience then. But it was it was one of those things where I was completely out of control.

I felt like I was above this couch. I was moaning and couldn't get a sound out and couldn't had no control over my body. What was being done. And, and I remember waking up that morning feeling completely released. Like there was something that was evil inside of me that I had no clue that I was even walking with. And, and it's real. And so, so that was a big piece of my walk. Now, keep in mind before this, you know, I, I think I was about 17 years old. I already signed up for the military.

Brent Stone (10:36.352)
Wow.

JR Spear (10:52.898)
And that's a whole nother story. And I'm a junior in high school. And, you know, my plan was to go in the military and follow the path that my grandfather did where he was on a ship and aviation boats may handle it. But I it was during this time I was getting more plugged into the church. And then I was eventually graduating high school and I signed up for this missions trip. And my life was completely transformed and changed at that time and didn't know what it was going to be like. I was even debating is like, OK, do I go in the military? Do I do something else or whatever? But I was committed because I was like, I don't I didn't want

I didn't want to go to college. I didn't want to do any of that stuff. So the military seemed like the right path for me and it kind of, uh, I needed it. It woke me up, helped me get mature, helped me kind of walk into the place of where I'm at today. And when I went into a bootcamp, so I went into the Navy and I remember to, to kind of a little backstory of that too, is when I was going through all this, you know, troubled time, I was in trouble with the law, needed a bunch of money, lost my job, lost my license and, and had a stack full of tickets that I couldn't pay for. I had,

you know, some court fees that I needed to pay for and just was in a total mess. And I, I couldn't even tell you how much that I racked up. I mean, I would, I, I would get tickets on a regular basis for anything. It could be driving reckless or just being out in public that I would literally get it from the cop. And first off, the cops knew me by name at this time, but I would get it from the cop and I was still in the glove box and you open the glove box and everything would just fall out. And I never, never took care and never looked at it again. I was like, ah, whatever, just another thing. And so, uh, you know, God really had a grace.

over my life at that time because for one, I should have been in more trouble and probably in jail for everything that I've done and not paying for these tickets for that. And two, just like watched and guide my path over. You really changed me and guide my steps of where I was going. And because I signed up for the military, the court waived every single ticket that I had. And my recruiter went up there, told him what...

was going on. This is where I'm at. And you know, God gave me grace during that moment. And not just that in school, like I remember my junior and even majority of my senior year, I didn't show up at like 50% of the year, like I went to choir class office running class and all the classes that were fun that didn't really require anything. And I never really went but you know, they still gave me a diploma and graduate me. I mean, it was I graduated the 1.2 GPA. I didn't know what that meant at the time.

JR Spear (13:15.714)
But they were just wanting to get me out of there and they knew my path. And I was like, man, God really gave me grace. I mean, my, my English teacher, my senior year gave me a C. I probably went to class maybe five times the whole year and he gave me a C and I was like, well, you know, was that right? Was it wrong? I don't know. But you know, I look back and it's like every single where I'm at today is like, God watched my steps, every single thing that I was doing, which brings me, I'm going to fast forward a few years.

Brent Stone (13:15.884)
Yeah.

JR Spear (13:43.498)
So I went in the, right out of high school, I went into bootcamp and you know, there was a lot that went on in the military that I exposed to, but you know, this is 2003 when I went to bootcamp and then 2006 I ended up transferring. Well, I went in the Navy as an aviation boatsman handler and which means I would have been fuelman on a ship where I fueled the jets as I getting on. So that, but in bootcamp.

I found about this job called an RP and it stood for religious program specialists where essentially I was going to be, you know, provide administrative tasks, but also security for the chaplain. And you can, as an RP, you can be on the Navy side and be on a ship. You can be in a hospital or you can be with the Marines. Well, when I signed up for the military, I knew I wouldn't go army or air force, you know, just had a different stigma about it. But you know, I was thinking you're going to be Navy because my grandfather was Navy and my uncle was a Marine and it was going to be one of them. But at that moment, I was like, I,

I don't want to go in the Marine Corps because they're too tough. And at that time I was, I was lazy. I didn't want to do anything. So I didn't go into the Marine Corps, but when I went in the bootcamp and I found out about his job as an RP and, uh, I end up, I ended up being assigned to the Marine Corps unit and spend my next four years with the Marine Corps. So I was like, you know, I didn't want to go to the Marine Corps because they're too tough, but God wanted me in the Marine Corps, even though it was my plan to go into the Navy, it was his plan to put me where he did. And so that, that was, uh, that was a really cool.

process to be able to see like where he took me. But, you know, throughout that journey in the military, you know, I went through some crazy experiences, especially when I got transferred to the second time, fourth Marines and deployed with the 15th Mew in 2006 and 2007. And one thing you have to understand is as an RP, you are providing security because chaplains are non-combatants, meaning they can't carry a weapon even for defense.

So there's no nine mil, there's no M16, there's no knife that they can even carry and the corpsmen and medical professionals, they can carry, they're still non-combatants but they can carry a weapon for defense. So they had to protect the person that they're trying to, you know, patch up wounds or whatever it may be, they can still do it but they can't offensively go out there and be a rifleman. So I'm getting deployed with my chaplain out in Iraq and there's a lot of stories that I can go through but there's one particular day that pretty much transformed

JR Spear (16:02.75)
the trajectory of my entire life. And it was on February 7 2007. And I woke up and keep in mind me and the chaplain we didn't have a really great relationship. There was a lot of things that took place and we were just kind of you know kept you did our job but we didn't weren't really that close. But so I woke up on that morning and it was sunny out in the middle of the desert it was bright and great weather we just got back from a long mission the night before and so can I probably go to go

rendezvous point to where we normally meet and he wasn't there and I was like where the heck is the chaplain so my like he's he doesn't go anywhere or can do anything without me at least knowing because my Responsibility is to make sure that his safety is always intact And so I went I went walked around the camp and I was like, okay, you know, where's chaplain went to HQ headquarters Went to calm and all these different things. Well, apparently

He decided to go for a stroll out in the city, which it was not a safe city, but a stroll out in the city with our Sergeant Major and Battalion CO, and I was like, what the heck is he doing? Because even if they put a Marine with them, or they're protecting him, like it's my responsibility if anything would happen to him. And so he's not just putting himself at risk, he's putting me at risk as well. And so I found a convoy that could meet us down at a checkpoint where we had a bunch of Marines.

JR Spear (17:27.718)
and they were going to drop us some supply and I found out where the chaplain was and we made it so that way we would be in this area and reconnect. Well, the place where we met was a walk-in checkpoint where we, we searched everyone that was walking in and out of the city. So there's driving checkpoints, there's walking checkpoints and all these different places, but this is close to the Euphrates river. And we, we had a building that, that stood up pretty high that we can go on the roof and overlook the city and see the long lines. I mean, this is probably like 50 to a hundred plus people.

on both ends waiting to come in and out. And so we would have them at a distance and one person walks up, they come in, do a thing, and then they go on. And so we got this building and then there's like a center courtyard area. And then there's like a little turn where we actually had, you know, a barricade like concrete blocks that you would see on the side of a highway that separated, you know, people walking in and out. And then there was a doorway in between. So that way we can kind of go back and forth in between those two spaces. So while I'm still waiting for the chaplain, you know, I'm, I'm hanging out there with another Marine.

Brent Stone (18:22.657)
the

JR Spear (18:27.286)
at the center and I'm just talking to locals and just being a good face providing good morale to the Marines and the local people come by and, and just, you know, providing just being their support. And then eventually the chaplain and getting there with our CO and Sergeant Major and he was in that center courtyard area between the building and where this walkway was, and talking to other Marines doing this thing. So I kind of knew where he was, I knew that he was he was safe where we're at.

And so I just decided to stay like where we were so I can kind of see activity that was coming in and out of. And then, uh, while I'm standing there, you know, I'm getting this, this urge or this voice. And to me, I always like to picture this almost like a voice of where God was talking to Moses and giving them instruction what to do. And it was so clear as like, Hey, go check on the chaplain. And I was like, okay, who is that? I'm like looking around like, where's that voice coming from? I thought it was just another, another Marine or someone talked to me. And I was like, okay, who's, who's talking to me?

And so then I wasn't responding. I was like, okay, the chaplain's over there. We're good to go. And I couldn't really see him because it was blocked by a barricade and stuff like that. But then the voice came again as a, Hey, go check on the chaplain. And I'm like, okay, you know, I know where the chaplain's at. He's good to go. And then the third time, and then I still wasn't responding. And by the fourth time when I still wasn't responding, I was hearing this audible voice and this is the first time and probably the only time I really heard it. It was when I wasn't responding, I started feeling sick.

And where I felt I don't know if anyone's ever listening to this has ever like blacked out or they start feeling like the blood rushing from their head and you're feeling a little bit pale and like, what's going on? Then I start feeling nauseous. Like I'm getting ready to throw up. And so I was like, man, I'm not I'm not feeling well. And so I you got to get you have to understand I was feeling fine all day. Like there's nothing that should have had. I mean, I was well hydrated. I was well, you know, fed and all these different things. There's no reason why I should have felt all this. And then I started feeling like nervous and then, you know, like something was getting

really bad was getting ready to happen. And so when I started feeling, you know, nausea and stuff, I was like, oh, you know, I told the Marine that I was standing there, I was like, hey, I'll be back and I'm gonna walk over there. Was going around the corner to check on the chaplain and see where he's at. And as I'm walking towards, I was going by the entrance where people were walking into the city. And so they had to come through this checkpoint area. And then my Sergeant Major was walking right past me and I looked up at him.

JR Spear (20:48.174)
greeted him and we made this turn. Well, he ended up walking to like where exactly where I was at where the other Marine was. And I made it around that turn see the chaplain I'm in the grass area and staying about seven feet away from where the entrances were people coming in. And then at that moment, there was a guy that walked through lips lifted his arms strapped to see for him blew himself up.

It was that moment we didn't know what was happening. It was nothing but chaos. I mean, right when that blast happened, we thought it was mortars coming in and it was just a, it was a major attack. I mean, if you think of like a war movie, this is, this was like the one experience or moment that can be made into a movie and it still wouldn't justify the, like the impact that this made. When that blast happened, I was thrown, I was left unconscious.

Brent Stone (21:35.948)
Yeah.

JR Spear (21:40.798)
And, you know, I didn't know if I had any limbs, my whole right side, my body was completely numb and my, I couldn't raise my arms. So my rifle I'm right-handed. So I couldn't raise my arm to lift up my rifle and my right leg was numb. The side of my face was completely numb, ringing. I couldn't see, you know, I could see like just like maybe a foot in like a front of me to my left and right. And everything was completely clouded. And, you know, finally I could.

get a little bit of visual in front of me, but still couldn't hear. I saw the chaplain on the ground and he was trying to crawl and he was trying to get underneath the building and I remember seeing him in that moment and I had my first Arnagani that was back, you know, probably 25 yards in front of me and they're waving I couldn't really hear what was going on but I grabbed that I was crawling on the ground staying low as much as I could because I didn't know what was going on grabbed the chaplain by the back of his flak and dragged him probably 25 to 30 yards until I got him into safety and then I

went out and helped the Marines with whatever we needed going on. And so after that moment I was able to come to, I realized Sergeant Major who was that I just walked right past was staying in the same spot where I was standing for the longest time with that Marine ended up paying the ultimate sacrifice and died during that suicide bombing. And the other Marine that I was standing with lost both of his legs and we lost another female Marine that was staying further away. And she died strictly of the impact alone in our interpreter, Jimmy.

And I was with Jimmy. And once I got the chaplain ready, I saw a corpsman and another Marine over trying to, you know, pretty much patch up all of the blood that was squirting out of Jimmy. I mean, he was just like, just squirting down. So we're trying to pack up all the holes with quick clot. And I'm standing over the top of his head and looking at him, trying to slap him. And I was pretty close to Jimmy and we got to build a pretty quality relationship since before then. And

you know, we couldn't save him and just saw his eyes rolled back of his head and take his last breath and he was gone. And, uh, you know, that, that experience itself definitely transformed, changed my life because, you know, if I, if I knew one thing people needed to know too, is like before I got in a Humvee anytime and which was always one of the most scariest spots for me, it was like anytime I had to get behind on the drive cause you know, we were fighting a ghost.

JR Spear (23:56.226)
We didn't know if IEDs were gonna be blown off on the side of the road or what was gonna happen. I always memorized and prayed Psalm 91. And if people don't know what that verse is, it's the beginning part saying, "'He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High "'shall abide under the shadow of the mighty.' And then moves on and says, "'A thousand may fall at your side "'and ten thousand your right hand, "'but you shall not be touched.'" I was the closest person to that entire blast from any other person that got injured. And yet I walked away with a pin drop of blood on the back of my flak.

and no external injuries. And I'm still able to stand here today to be able to share the story. Versus even the chaplain had body parts that was blowing up all over him and losing our sergeant major and a bunch of other injuries. I mean, I have friends that even 10 plus years later still haven't shrapnel taken out of their bodies from that event and from small little fragments and stuff like that. And yeah, and it's looking back and I try to...

Brent Stone (24:44.515)
Wow.

JR Spear (24:50.226)
I asked God constantly is like, you know, why me and why, what does he have bigger for me? And I, and it is, I've always questioned this and it never really like in the military, we're trained to just adapt and forget it, move on. And so it's like, okay, you stay in that fight no matter what. And you know, I was part of the, I helped clean up the body parts. I'm picking up the guy's torso, his arms, legs, even his head, the only one in bags and like really trying to help clean up the area and everything that was going on. And, but

You know years later. I started reflecting like you know God's got a bigger plan for my life and not I'm not allowed to say this I know what the plan is I'm not allowed to say that I don't know what that plan is because I've been challenged and not say that because God's Definitely revealed it to me and what he's telling me is just I'm not ready yet and in this moment But but it's coming it's coming big and so but I want to I want everyone to hear this too that have been February 7 2007 I'm still in a lot of pain today

from like back injuries and even facial injuries, you know, just numbness. And even when I talk and right now I can echo my own voice on my right side of my ear. So I do suffer some of that pain. And but, you know, when I got back from deployment on May 31st, that same year, and I'm reunited with my mother and my wife now, Natalie.

And we were dating at that time and my mom, she, she asked me, she was like, Hey, did something happen while you're over there? Cause everything goes when anytime someone gets injured, anyone dies, it gives blackout. There's no communication and no one back home other than the families really knows exactly what happened. They just know like, okay, someone got hurt, someone got injured, but they don't know details or whatever. And so she asked me if something happened. I said, I mean, yeah, I experienced a lot. There was, I was exposed to a lot. I've seen a lot of death. I mean, I, you know, I've seen a lot of people get hurt and things like that when we were in war. Yeah, that's, that's part of war.

And I was like, yeah, why, what's up? And she goes, well, that January prior to my event, she was at our church that I kind of grew up in and stuff. And there was a guest speaker. Well, that guest speaker called my mom out and he was prophesied over and believes in prophetic prayer and prophesied over and was like, hey, do you have a child that's over in the Middle East right now?

JR Spear (27:04.79)
And she was like, yeah, my son, my son's over in Iraq right now and serving our country. And, and then he, he got really silent and he was like, well, I want to share something with you, but I want to make sure that you're, you're going to be okay to hear this. She's like, okay, what, what do I, what do you got to tell me? He's saying something really bad is getting ready to happen. Not sure what it's going to, what it is, but something really bad is getting ready to happen. But I want you to know that he's going to be protecting him and surrounded by a thousand angels.

And it was, that was the prayer of Psalm 91 that I always did. And the only reason why, like, if I, if I, if I close my eyes and I really ask like, God, you know, Jesus, where are you at in this moment? I can see him almost completely protecting, like washing over me, almost like a dome over my body as his blast is happening and just kind of nothing could harm me in that moment. And, you know, looking at him and saying, Hey, you know, why, why did you sacrifice me? Why did you protect me? And, and pretty much what he tells me is like, I'm not done with you.

And he's got a much bigger plan. And, and, you know, there's, there's been a lot of things that's happened over my life since then, but, you know, he's given me some visions and he's given me a lot of things over the years, uh, since, since I've been back of, you know, even prior to me deploying and prior to going to military, some visions that he has revealed to me that I completely forgot until the more, you know, last couple of years and, uh, one of the, and I shared it with you a couple of weeks ago, but

when I rededicated I'm with Michael, Michael Scholes, and we're, we go to, you know, I was still in trouble this time. I'm still trying to figure things out. And so my mom, you know, she asked if I can go to work with him one day and just kind of him mentor me. So I went to work with him and he worked at a big printing company. And so he had me cut vinyl. And I remember I was cutting vinyl and there with another one of his employees and

And, uh, and God just kept pouring this vision in me. And it was like so heavy. Like it was like, I couldn't get out, out. I couldn't focus on what I was doing. It was like, what the heck is this? Like I never experienced a vision or I never experienced anything like this in my, you know, before and pretty much when it, when he was given this to me, this is prior to military and you know, when I'm at work with Michael, I went and wrote down like this long pages of letters and, uh, of what it is, just trying to brain dump everything that it was. And.

JR Spear (29:24.458)
I couldn't tell you where the letters are today, but I remember exactly kind of the picture of what was being said. But God has me stand on the stage and there's tens of thousands of people on the crowd and all of them are mute. None of like, it's like their mouths are being taped or glued or stitched shut and none of them can speak, but I'm standing up on that stage and God's using me as a voice to fight for them and to speak for them. And I never really thought, here's the crazy thing.

I never thought about that vision until about a year or two later ago from today. And so I'm going on what is like almost 18 years and never really thought about that again. And all of a sudden I'm like, why am I thinking about this again? It was like, Oh yeah, God told me this a long time ago. And, and a lot of times in our faith we try to manufacture certain things. We try to manufacture what we think God is saying, what Jesus is telling us, what, what is this prophetic thing that we feel God is telling us or where do we want us to be? And we try to make things up cause we feel like it's right.

And so I think I just blocked that out of my life and just never really thought it was like, okay, maybe I'm just on fire for Christ and I'm fire for God and whatever, whatever it may be. And, and that was just nothing. And you know, for the longest time it was nothing. And it wasn't anything that I really needed to know at that moment because it wasn't, it wasn't meant for me to remember at that time and to be fixated on it during those moments. But up until like a year or two ago, that those visions started coming back to me. And, and this is about time when

You know, Michael started coming back into my life and I was like, Whoa, what is this? Why am I thinking about this? Why am I thinking about this moment? And then when God, you know, have this revealed to me and now it's like all the pieces are starting to come together for me. So I'm going, I'm going, and I say this because in our life, we never really know why we're going through something that we're going through. And it may not be for that exact moment, but it's to prepare you for something bigger later.

And so God orchestrated a lot of these things. Like I went through those troubled times in my teenage years, so I can actually reflect back on that to be able to help other people. I went through that period of in church and rededicating and being exposed to those people and finding that girl at that Oktoberfest so I can reconnect and start building relationships with people that over 22, 23 years later, that I'm still really close friends with even till today. And even time to lead me and guide me in my path from when I was in the military and went through those experiences.

JR Spear (31:43.498)
was to really show and use as a testimony to really be a voice for other people. And then even not having that period of time of my life where I completely forgot about that. And, and, and honestly, not even pursuing his heart for many years. Yes, I've always been a Christian and yes, I was doing it, but that fire wasn't like instilling or flaming inside of me until more recently where it's like, okay, I'm preparing you even stronger now. And that, and you asked the questions like, what is God doing now in my life? And I'm telling you,

He's preparing me for something bigger that none of us are even ready to, to even, you know, can't even fathom. And I know that he's got a big plan for me during those moments. And I'm just, and he's just for this whole time was learning how to prepare for war, learning how to be prepared for combat and learning how to actually understand tactical strategies to maneuver through those different things is all to get me ready for whatever's getting ready to come. And I believe that so strongly, like I,

It's like burning inside me more strong than it's ever been in my entire life. Even during the moment when I rededicated my life to Christ and was baptized in the Holy spirit and just kind of getting to that place. It's like, he's getting me ready for something, but we're, we're in a spiritual warfare and if people aren't ready and they're not arm on themselves and they're not, you know, planning that the word of God onto their hearts, they're in route for a rude awakening. And I just know that he's got something in plan for me and he's preparing me. And then when that day comes, you know, I'm gonna,

I'm going to be ready there to serve and fight for whatever he needs me to do.

Brent Stone (33:17.309)
It's awesome, man. Yeah, your story, it's just gripping. There's a lot there. God's been so good. He's walked you through some really tough stuff. There's no doubt about that. What's really interesting is that as we get into the space where...

you're starting to have these visions of what he's called you to do. It's exciting. And you've experienced change and there's different things that happen over the course of time. And I think what you're probably experiencing now is that as you're getting to his appointed time for you to carry out some of these things, it's starting to become very, very loud or yeah, loud is probably a good word.

JR Spear (34:03.666)
Yeah, I want I want to give some word of encouragement for people too. And people need to really understand that the enemy doesn't want to focus on those that he's already won. That's not pursuing God's vision for their life or that he's got hold on. He wants to focus on those that are going to be helping, you know, growing God's kingdom and that God has a plan because he knows it, he sees it. And his only mission is to come steal, kill and destroy every aspect of your life and what you're doing. And when you're when you're not in tune with

focused on God's vision God's plan for you because our promise to us that God gave us is saying hey I have a future in a plan for your life that gives you a hope in the future and that is Jeremiah 2011 That is a truth that God has for all of us. So every person listening in this if they're like, hey I don't have a story like Brent. I don't have a story like you I don't have a story like for like so-and-so but the matter of fact is we all have a story but we all have Something that God's taken us to and the reason why I say that because the more that I've been kind of going through this journey

the more the enemy has been trying to attack me. And when I'm talking about attacking, I'm talking about ripping my family apart, ripping my businesses apart, ripping some of the closest relationships I have. And it was a matter of me of going down to the cross and saying, hey God, here I am. This is not for me to control, but for you. And he had a grip on me. I mean, you know a lot of my personal stories and you helped me walk through some of that. And it took me a lot of realization about where I was at in the moment because

it creeps on up on you like you have no clue. You know, like how did I end up in this place? How did I get into such a dark place of, of where I'm at? And, you know, and it feels like it happened just so quick, but it happened over a period of time. And the enemy is so tactical like that, just like when I'm in combat, like the enemy is not going to sit there and fight you face to face. Majority time they're tactical. They're going to out there and they're, they have a strategy that's going to help get there so that way they can attack you in the best of way.

where it's gonna come like an ambush and surprise you. And that's what the enemy is here to do for all of us right now because he's been trying to do it for me. And it's really cool because I'm like in a place now where I can laugh at it because like, hey, you got no grip on me. And I know like I completely like surrendered it over and it's like, hey, you know, the Holy Spirit is like literally watching my every step in the relationships. And when we just got off a really powerful weekend with you and I...

JR Spear (36:24.998)
thank you for getting me to go there at the vision quest within your church. And, and it was, it was awesome. Cause you know, there's, there's been moments that weekend that I was praying. I was like, you know, I got, I want you to remove people from my life and also business that, that don't belong. That's not, that's gonna distract me. That's going to lose focus. And I get back home on and start working on that Monday. And like, within, within just a few days, there was like four or five people that ended up leaving our, our community.

And I was like, but I'm looking at him like, man, that is so cool because I'm not upset about it. I'm more of like, whoa, God's moving. He like, he's getting ready.

Brent Stone (37:00.097)
We had, we had, I have to share this with these just, just so you can not empathize, but just kind of laugh about it with me. So we had our, we have a prophetic prayer team for, for business at our church. And this is a whole nother discussion. We could probably do a whole nother episode on this. I've had people be like, what do you mean you have people going on praying for businesses to like make money and this and that? And I'm like, don't, don't you understand? It's like so much bigger than that. Like,

Yes, they go and pray for businesses, but it's not all about money. And if that's if that's if that's what you're thinking, that's a problem. But one of the things that they're praying for was that, you know, that the that the patients that come in and out of our office, the particular business they prayed for was our dental operation. And so we do a lot of surgery there. And so that that, you know, are like the patients that come in, you know, they would, you know, feel God's love when they come into our building, that they would, you know, have super fast recovery.

JR Spear (37:31.895)
Yeah.

Brent Stone (37:51.764)
that they would feel peace when they come in, you know, like all these things. And that also that for the work environment to be good and you know, for people that didn't need to be there, you know, they would find other opportunities and we could replace them with the right people. We had four people leave. And from when that happened, we had four people leave within like three weeks. And that was pretty wild.

JR Spear (38:08.27)
Are you employees or a client?

JR Spear (38:13.966)
That's crazy. And the only thing we can do is just laugh at it. We can just be like, man, God's at work. Because it's like when he pulls the, we talked about.

Brent Stone (38:19.303)
Yeah.

It tests your faith though. It tests your faith, because we're like whoa, but it's for the better.

JR Spear (38:27.262)
But here's the thing, I've been, like, I know you've gone through some of the similar situations like this over the years. I've been in places like this where he's ripped so many different things apart from my business, whether it's employees or clients or whatever. And it freaked me out. And so like when this is happening, I'm like, I'm literally chuckling and laughing at it. So like, because when I'm seeing the type of people that go on one, every one of those individuals that end up leaving and requested to leave.

They're not aligned with Christ. They're more in the spiritual universe, woo type business. And it's just, it's, the other one thing that kept coming to work when we were at VisionQuest was about the fruit of the tree and how God's gonna come and start pruning away the different things that don't belong. Because if you're not pruning away the bad pieces, it starts spoiling all the other branches and the fruit that's on the tree. And so these people that are being pruned away, it's like, they don't belong there and you don't know why.

Brent Stone (39:10.666)
Yeah.

Brent Stone (39:17.322)
Yeah.

JR Spear (39:24.262)
Oh, God's revealing to me why they're not there. But sometimes your question is like, oh, why are they going? But it's opening up doors for the right people. And I'm telling you, within BLN itself, it's like, I feel like God's going to use it in such a more powerful way. And ministry where I'm like, there you go, God. And it's just funny to see what it's doing and how what like where what he's doing in his works and just showing up and just lies being changed and not.

Brent Stone (39:42.506)
Yeah.

JR Spear (39:52.246)
just business-wise, lives are being changed personally just from within. And it's, it's been really, really cool.

Brent Stone (39:58.476)
It's awesome. Well, hey, man, this has been great. And I, and I so appreciate you coming on here and not only sharing your story of transformation, but also like some encouragement towards the end there for people, because I think that that's, that's really big. And there's going to be other people that watch this that might have, you know, law enforcement or military background or so that can relate to a lot of the stuff that you shared. Whereas, you know, some other backgrounds might, you know, they might not have been exposed to some of that. And so it's, it's good. It's good perspective.

for people of all walks of life. So thank you so much. And we'll have to get you back on here again. We'll talk about some other stuff dealing with like prophetic and getting into some of that stuff. It'll be really awesome. But yeah, hey, thanks JR. Appreciate you man. All right, thank you all for tuning in. Please like and subscribe.

JR Spear (40:39.404)
Yeah.

JR Spear (40:42.696)
I'm here, thank you.